Old Timers’ Midweek Special

By Gerard Sarnat

Clip a coupon from your local paper, get 20% off

on maximally invasive hip replacement prostheses

by taking advantage of one-time-while-they-last offers

on the 2011-12 models before the FDA formally recalls them.


But wait there is more -- while they last, we will throw in

the award-winning-handy-dandy-all-purpose-post-operative

Hip Kit which contains not only the NASA-tested statistically clinically

proven-to-make-you-independent world famous Shoe-Sock-Tool


plus also, believe it or not, the new and improved Sammons 6-in-1

Preston Feather Economy Reacher/ 32" Grabber Tool with Magnet/

Lightweight 7 oz. Magnetic Picker Up Tool & Reaching Claw/

Aluminum Trash Pickup Aid/ Light Bulb Remover/ Garden Nabber


for the unbelievably reduced price of  $34.99 down from $54!!

But wait there’s more -- if you buy now, we’ll toss in the Sponge Handle

Back-Toes Scrubber so you can do yourself the shower  -- or purchase

two and have a partner pitch in like you’re going through a car wash.